Showing posts with label Self-sabotage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Self-sabotage. Show all posts

Saturday, October 11, 2014

I Like to Feel Like Crap

So, here's a true confession:

I don't really want to feel well, even though I think I do (and, yes, part of me genuinely does). 

Lately, the way I screw myself up is I end up eating the wrong things. I end up not moving my body even though I know it literally saves me from feeling like crap - physically, emotionally, psychologically. (gah! exercise. ick.)

I end up with migraines, body aches, and malaise on so many levels.


I know I do this. I have known I do this for quite some time.

I do things like...

Saturday, June 1, 2013

Shhhhh... I'm hunting wabbits!


In the immortal words of Elmer Fudd, "Ssssshhhhh! Be vewy, vewy quiet... I'm hunting wabbits!"

Well, not wabbits exactly, but I'm hunting other stuff. Personal world stuff. And, apparently, it's very -very- sensitive to being talked about. 

In fact, it prefers the sounds of silence! Silencio! *waves magic wand* 

This goes beyond the idea of self-talk or word choice. No, it's not like that at all. 

And it's something different from the ol' "don't disperse energy by talking about it". That's when you have some big goal or plan, and you start talking about it to some people or lots of people and it somehow runs down the little mountain of excitement and energy you're sitting on until you don't even care if you do it anymore. You lose steam and that's it. It never happens.

That's a real thing, but it's not like that this time. It's something different.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Self-Sabotage... Entering Negotiations!

Grand Prismatic Spring in Yellowstone National Park
Self-sabotage is a powerful force... and usually an unconscious one.

You don't feel it coming, except you see the evidence of wreckage in your life. You will see it by its fruits.

The inner Saboteurs residing in our subconscious psyche are always trying to keep us safe, so it's not like they are trying to hurt us.

They are generally trying to help save us from some horrid fate or, in my case, the threat of (perceived) death.  

But the reality is that we can outgrow the wisdom of our Saboteurs. We need different boundaries than the ones they are enforcing. 

Today, I had a "come to Jesus" moment with recognizing some powerful Saboteur energy running my life these days. 

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